My Biggest Satisfaction

It's a early Tuesday morning and I'm feeling quite AWESOME!!!

Today I came across a quote that I can really identify with it and it came from none other than Roman Polanski. He said "I can only say that whatever my life and work have been, I'm not envious of anyone-and this is my biggest satisfaction." After reading that quote I realized that I feel the same way. I feel like the things I've been through and all the good, bad, harm, or help I've done in my life so far have made me who I am today and have shaped the kind of person that I am. Even after all that I have been through I'm not in the least bit envious of anyone. Why should I be after all? The things that happen to us seem to me to be like building blocks. They help us grow, and learn, and at the sametime they add a little bit of excitement to our lives.

Learning that nobody is perfect seems to be a ever learning challenge. I use to think that I had to be the best example of perfection back when I was in high school. I felt like I had to be a part of everything that I could be in...even if I really wasn't the best at it like basketball...and every black guy is supposed to instantly know how to play that sport right? I wasn't envious and I didn't want anyone to envious of me..I just wanted to belong to apart of some of everything. Now that I'm pulling away from more things and now soley focusing on Theatre and trying to climb that ladder of stardom I've come to learn that my biggest satifaction is that I haven't been envious of anyone. I think that's due to the fact that I'm always caught up in anything that I'm doing that I don't have time to be envious of anyone.

Also learning to love myself has been a GREAT learning experience. I've learned that I've got to love myself before I can even begin to let someone be in my life. When I learned that I was ready to begin let someone in my life.

Perfection isn't everything anymore and I'm not striving to be perfect anymore. I have flaws like everybody else and that feels good. I'm not going to srive and be a people pleaser anymore..cause that's way to much damn work and it makes me so tired that I want to sleep. I learned that from College Night..hahah!!!! I was so busy people pleasing that it didn't do anything but make me constantly tired physically.

To wrap this blog up I'm going to start anew and if people don't like it then where they my friends to begin with it? I guess that's for me to answer.